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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  October 13, 2012 12:00am-1:05am PDT

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news. we hope you have a great weekend. tonight on "jimmy kimmel live" -- >> tonight is one of the only nights of the year where you might actually hear someone say, honey, turn on c-span. >> amy poehler. >> did you watch any of the debate? >> i haven't yet, but i'm hoping that barack is wearing a red leather suit and never comments on it. >> alan arkin. >> i grabbed him by the throat, i said, "shut up!" >> and music from garbage. >> how are you, my brother from a totally separate
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tonight -- amy poehler. alan arkin. and music from garbage. with cleto and the cletones. and now, if you don't mind, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live" >> jimmy: hi, everyone. hola. welcome. that's very nice. hi there, i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for being here tonight. [ cheers and applause ] i had a feeling you were planning something, and you got me again. well, it was a big night for american politics, tonight, the
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first presidential debate of 2012. tonight was one of the only nights of the year when you might actually hear someone say, honey, turn on c-span. [ laughter ] the debate took place at the university of denver in colorado, it was moderated by jim lehrer from pbs and sponsored by mountain dew code red. [ laughter ] they have sponsors. this is the first debate, it's key because if a candidate does well, they can sometimes go on to become president. so, you really want to have a good showing. the debate, i think, it's still happening right now as we tape the show. the candidates decided who would get to speak first tonight via a coin toss, which was confusing for mitt romney, they had to explain what a coin was. he had never seen one before. [ laughter ] and it also happens to be, tonight happens to be the obama's 20th wedding anniversary. which, that seems very convenient to me. honey, i'd love to go to the ballet with you, but i'm debating mitt romney that night. hey, mitt, help me out, will you?
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we got to -- [ laughter ] according to "the new york times," team romney has been working on what they call zingers for mitt to use tonight. just an fyi, if you call it a zinger, probably isn't one. we got some zingers, we got some whimsy, we've got some farcical remarks tonight. romney has reportedly been rehearsing these for months. his staff said he started working on them in august. he even hired a company to write some zingers for him. you know, he hired a company that we sometimes use here at the show to write jokes for us, so, i thought we should ask them about it. and i believe we have them on video chat right now. see if we can hook into it. hello. >> iphone 5 map app help center. however are you -- how are you lost today? >> jimmy: no, no, it's me, jimmy kimmel. >> oh, hi, mr. jimmy kimmel. jimmy kimmel! jimmy kimmel! how are you, my brother from a totally separate mother?
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>> jimmy: i am -- i'm good, bro. so, hey, i -- the reason i'm calling is i heard that mitt romney hired you to write zingers for his debate tonight. >> ah, yes. mr. mittens romney paid us handsomely for our top notch zingers of the president obama. >> jimmy: he did. how -- >> we worked with mr. romney for many years. >> jimmy: oh, you haven't. i didn't know. what have you been doing for him for many years? >> we write his jokes and we make his dockers. >> jimmy: you make his dockers? oh, yeah, they are -- they are dockers. all right. [ laughter ] it's okay if he sits down now. i got it. i didn't know any of that. so, can you share some of the zingers that didn't make it into tonight's debate? >> oh, most certainly. we will get our king of zing to deliver them. roger! >> jimmy: great, yeah, get him. >> roger!
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roger -- jimmy kimmel. >> oh, jimmy. >> jimmy: oh, wow, look at that. very realistic. >> we make mr. romney masks. >> jimmy: oh, you do. oh, okay. they look very good. >> knock, knock. >> jimmy: ah, who's there? >> kenya. >> jimmy: kenya who? >> kenya believe that president obama was born in america? we cannot! >> jimmy: all right, that's -- that's cute, that's cute. do you have another one? >> how many president obamas does it take to change a lightbulb? >> jimmy: i don't know. >> zero. they're all sitting in the dark and hope will it change by itself. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, look at
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that. it's obama. >> we make many masks. >> jimmy: i can see that. it looks like he might have that mask on backwards, though. >> oh. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, there we go. hey, give us one more joke and i'll let you go, all right? >> okay, let's go. president obama -- >> jimmy: yeah, give us a good one. yeah. there's no rush. there's no rush. >> president obama is so fat -- >> jimmy: wait a minute. he's not fat at all. >> president obama is so fat -- >> jimmy: he's as skinny as a rail, but -- >> president obama is so fat -- >> jimmy: all right, how fat is he?
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>> he is so fat they had to make the oval office round to fit him. >> jimmy: oh. >> see, in india, he is considered very, very fat. >> jimmy: oh, i see, okay, that makes sense. all right, well, thanks so much, guys. [ applause ] thank you. >> thank you, jimmy. >> jimmy: there you go. [ applause ] there was -- there was another very heated debate today. this had nothing to do with american politics but it was "american idol." "american idol" comes back in january, with new judges mariah carey and nicki minaj. they shot some of the audition portion of the show in charlotte, north carolina, yesterday, and you see here, they're getting along just great. >> think it's a joke? think it's a joke? think it's a joke. say one more disrespectful thing to me, if you say one more disrespectful thing to me, off with your head.
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off with your head. don't tell me i'm inadequate. you going to get sent -- i -- i don't feel inadequate. you're the insecure one sitting up here. i told them, i'm not [ bleep ] putting up with your [ bleep ] highness over there. figure it the [ bleep ] out. >> why, oh why, do i have a 3-year-old sitting around me. >> i'm not sitting here for 20 minutes and having you run down your resume every day. no, good-bye. >> i can't see my kids because you decided -- to have a little baby fit and going all around the stage. >> you're boring as [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: the best part is poor keith urban awkwardly sitting in between them. they really got into it, though. it's like "the real housewives of american idol" or something. on this season of "american idol," extensions will be pulled. you know, back in july, the city council here in l.a. voted to ban medical marijuana dispensaries. we have about 1,000 of them now.
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they were supposed to close, until activists collected tens of thousands of signatures and now the stores are going to remain open. it turns out, circulating a petition is the only thing pot smokers aren't too lazy to do. and they did it. and the city council respo responded -- [ applause ] and they voted 11-2 to overturn the ban. this is really -- it's great news for the thousands of people who suffer from fake back pain, fake neck pain, fake sleep disorders. also great news for the makers of chex party mix. meanwhile, in colorado, veterinarians there are saying they've seen an increase in the number of dogs being brought in for treatment because they're high. the number of dogs being treated for pot consumption has quadrupled since medical marijuana was legalized in colorado 12 years ago. they say there's been a huge increase in the number of dogs streaming the movie "harold and kumar" on netflix. [ laughter ] but here is -- this is how you can tell if your dog is stoned. do they lounge around all day?
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will they eat anything they put in front of them? are they mesmerized by stupid things? if so, you may have a stoned dog. in your house. you may have a snoop dogg in your home. [ laughter ] hey, speaking of things that stoners do. there's a show on a channel called tru-tv called "bait car." this is a show -- police plant bait cars. i love this stuff. unlocked cars, put cameras in them and when a criminal gets in the car, drives off, they have a remote, they can lock the door and they kill the engine to capture the criminal. last night in the season premiere, they captured their first fan. >> car is away southbond, driver's door is open. he's keeping the door open. >> when the bait car door is left open, it tells us he knows it's a bait car. it's dangerous. they may run. >> i know -- i already knew. y'all ain't fooling nobody. full tank of gas -- come on. i'm over this [ bleep ]. whoa. aw!
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ha-ha! already knew it. already knew it. >> don't move, don't move. put your hands up. >> i already knew. >> how did you know? >> because i watch the show. >> jimmy: well, there you go. [ applause ] he already knew. legally, you're not allowed to arrest if he knew. he seems very happy. is it possible he thinks he's on "cash cab?" the sixth and final season of "jersey shore" premieres tomorrow night on mtv. "jersey shore" was an instant hit when it premiered back in 2009. still one of the most popular shows on cable, but the kids are moving on to other things, snooki had a baby, the situation is in geneva working on the particle accelerator, i think. and so for the sixth and final season, mtv is pulling out all the stops. >> if you love [ bleep ] -- >> we're on the jersey shore!
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>> get ready for season six of "jersey shore," featuring more grade-a [ bleep ] that you can stuff in your brain hole. you ignorant [ bleep ] head. your favorite [ bleep ] morons are back, doing all the stupid [ bleep ] idiots love. stupid [ bleep ] "jersey shore." >> oh, yes! >> all new episodes on mtv, the place for [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: i think they need to talk to the people in their promo department. [ applause ] here is something i'm surprised we haven't seen on "jersey shore" yet. have you heard of an activity called butt chugging? i learned about this today. apparently college kids, as part of their ongoing effort to get drunk faster, are funneling alcohol into their butts. so, a few weeks ago at the university of tennessee, an alleged incident sent a member of a fraternity to the hospital, his name is alexander. he was allegedly butt chugging wine, which adds a little class to it. [ laughter ]
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his blood alcohol content was .4, which is five times the legal limit to drive. that's -- he was very, very drunk. which caused a big commotion at the hospital. so, the university suspended his fraternity indefinitely. but alexander, the fraternity and now their attorney deny there was any butt chugging at all and the result of all this was perhaps the greatest press conference of all time. >> i informed him that the reason that i was there was to ask him whether or not he had been involved in an activity called butt chugging. and he looked at me like i had lost my mind. and said, what is that? and, ladies and gentlemen, that is the first time that he had ever heard of the two words butt chugging, which have now become two famous words across the united states and across the world. >> jimmy: they have? [ laughter ] across the world? [ applause ]
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are you trying to tell me that they're talking about butt chugging in cambodia right now? [ laughter ] and it didn't end there. there's one more thing the kid wanted his lawyer to mention. >> mr. broten, scotch, denies each and every allegation whatsoever, that has been inferred that he may be a gay man. he is a straight man and he thinks that the idea and the concept of butt chugging is absolutely repulsive. >> jimmy: well, thank you for clearing that up. mr. redenbacher. [ applause ] might be the worst e-harmony ad ever. this is an exciting new invention. this is from a design company called studio kg. they have offices in spain and switzerland and they have come
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up with something called the ostrich pillow. >> hi. we're studio kg. and we created the ostrich pillow. perfect companion to nap pretty much everywhere. good for an express power nap at work or for a good snooze on a long distance jet. >> jimmy: it's perfect for people who love to sleep at the airport but don't love to keep track of their belongings when they do. what a product. we're too busy butt chugging in america to think of that. and guillermo, i'm told that the ostrich pillow inspired you to come up with a product of your own. >> yes, jimmy. >> jimmy: and i'm told that at your own expense, you actually hired a film crew to help you kind of promote this thing? >> yes, jimmy. >> jimmy: and i'm told that we have that concept video and we're able to show it to everyone tonight. >> yes, jimmy. >> jimmy: thank you, guillermo. good work. >> hi, we're studio guillermo and we created the pinata pillow. it's a perfect companion to take a nap pretty much anywhere.
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be it for an express power nap at work. or a good snooze on a long distance jet. >> order now and receive a pinata sports cup absolutely free. not for use at children's parties. >> jimmy: candy in there, everyone. thank you, guillermo. we have a good show for you tonight. alan arkin is here. we have music from garbage. and we'll be right back with amy poehler, so stick around. have you ever had déja, deja, déja, deja-vu? the headphone jack is going to be on the bottom. (explosion noise) welcome back! guess the galaxy s3 didn't work out.
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>> jimmy: hi there, welcome back. tonight on the program, an academy award winning actor who, starting october 12th, you can see alongside the beautiful ben affleck in the new movie "argo," alan arkin is here. and then, with music from their first album in eight years, it's called "not your kind of people." garbage from the bud light outdoor stage. excited to have them. make sure to join us tomorrow night too. zac efron will be here, as will jack black, kyle gass and their band tenacious d. following tonight's presidential debate, it seems appropriate to welcome a guest who also makes a living pretending to be a selfless public servant. she is the very funny star of the show "parks and recreation" which airs thursday nights on nbc. please welcome america's favorite amy -- amy poehler. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. hi, guys.
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>> jimmy: how's it going? >> good, thank you, thank you so much for having me. you look great. you look very skinny. >> jimmy: oh, thank you. i haven't been eating. >> that's how it works. >> jimmy: seems to do the trick. you were very funny at the emmy awards. >> thank you. you were very funny. >> jimmy: you snatched a moment that could be potentially disappointing and you wove it into gold, didn't you? >> well, for those 10 or 15 people that didn't watch the emmy awards, julia louis-dreyfus and i did a bit where, when she won, she pretended -- we hugged and she pretended to take my speech by accident, so, she started reading my speech by accident. and it was all julia's idea. >> jimmy: oh, it was her idea? >> she called me the day of the emmys and said, i have this idea, do you want to do it with me? i think you're going to win. i said, i think you're going to win, so, we decided if either one of us won, we would do the bit. >> jimmy: did you feel worried you were jinxing yourselves? >> you know, jimmy, when you lose seven times -- [ laughter ]
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you don't give a crap anymore. >> jimmy: is it possible that julia called every one of the other nominees and said, i think you're going to win, oh, i think you're going to win and prepared this with each one of them? >> no way. julia, like me, enjoys a good bit. she's a gamer, so -- >> jimmy: there's nothing better than a good bit. >> i agree. because it's supposed to be a night of celebration, i'm happy to be there and the rest of it is just gravy. >> jimmy: i'll be honest. i, as you know, also lost on emmy night -- >> oh, that's right. >> jimmy: and i was planning to throw my parents out if i lost and i was hoping we would lose so i could throw them out of the theater, which was a weird position to be in, rooting against yourself. >> well, that is when julia won i was like, yes, i got to do my bit. maybe not the best -- >> jimmy: i think that is a good way of looking at it. >> yeah. >> jimmy: hey, tonight, with the presidential debate, did you watch any of it? >> no, i haven't yet. >> jimmy: okay, well -- what's it like when you are working on "saturday night live" and this happens?
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it's wednesday night -- >> right, so, this is -- when presidential debates happen, it's when i miss "snl" the most. because it used to be, you know, 40 comedy writers in a room with a lot of -- >> jimmy: 40? >> i'm exaggerating. >> jimmy: oh, okay. >> maybe like 20 comedy writers moving fast and we would order food and watch the debates and it was like a sporting event and it's really fun to watch political stuff with funny people. >> jimmy: and you are hoping bad things, even though you love your country, you're hoping that the two guys behave like imbeciles? >> i wish they would do bits. like, i wish they would -- you know, i'm sure -- people here in the audience have probably waited tables at some point. you would have -- i would have fantasies when i was waiting tables that i would do something really bad. i would pour food on the guy that was being a jerk to me. >> jimmy: impulses. >> yeah. and i imagine that it's so stressful that they must have fantasies about what they could do to screw it up. and i also have those fantasies.
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i think about what -- like, if the president came out in, just, like, opened with a song. [ laughter ] a real, like, jazzy song about what he's going to talk about. i don't know. >> jimmy: that would be spectacular. >> i know. i haven't watched the debates yet but i'm hoping that barack is, like, wearing a red leather suit that -- i want him to wear the delirious suit that eddie murray wore. >> jimmy: that would be excellent. >> wouldn't it be amazing if he came out in a full red leather suit and never commented on it. i would be just like -- >> jimmy: that would be good. [ applause ] it's funny, because -- >> the economy. >> jimmy: if mitt romney did it, it would be almost more disturbing. i think in a way. >> it would be great. but i mean -- but -- it would be just great if romney just told, like, sang, like, a really slow choral poem. i don't know. i think about these things sometimes. >> jimmy: yeah, well, you might want to send them a letter. you -- you have a website that you're involved with, or, do you
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own the website? is it your thing? >> it's a channel on youtube, it's called "smart girls at the party." thank you. >> jimmy: right. [ applause ] >> it's a new channel, we have all kinds of different shows and contest on there. and it's a great place to go, if you are a young person, to check out. comedy and -- >> jimmy: it's not just all comedy. you give like good advice to young girls. >> well, i -- i have this show called "ask amy," which i do these, like, two-minute, two-camera advice moments. >> jimmy: and these are things, questions people e-mail to you? >> yeah, we get great e-mails all over the world from young people, so, i try to answer them very honestly and under two minutes and try to not ramble and try my best to just, i don't know -- >> jimmy: which is good, because most of the women that, young girls see on television, are imbeciles, true? >> your words, not mine. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: maybe not most. >> i actually try to talk to a version of myself when i was that age, like, what i would have liked to have heard. >> jimmy: and some of the
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questions that you've been asked are, like -- >> you know, what do i do if i don't like how i look or, i'm anxious when i go to parties, or -- i fell down and i'm embarrassed, just, like, small -- >> jimmy: do you do any research or answer -- >> i don't do any research. i have very -- i am a professional actor and an unlicensed therapist so i have zero -- but i do just try to speak from the heart. >> jimmy: i see. what we've done, we asked some of the teenage girls of the staff members -- >> there's a lot of teenage staff members? that's weird. >> jimmy: no, no, the daughters -- >> oh, okay, good. >> jimmy: is it okay to shoplift as long as i do it from a foreign-owned store? [ laughter ] >> you know, whenever you start a question with, "is it okay," the answer is usually no, you know what i mean? i feel like you already know -- >> jimmy: that's really good advice. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: okay. is it true you can dissolve a
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dead body with lime? i don't know what's going on with these kids. >> yeah. kids these days with the internet, i mean -- >> jimmy: what about butt chugging? where do you stand on butt chugging? >> i stand firm. i stand firm. >> jimmy: against, for? >> what i liked the best about that press conference is, he said butt chugging is popular all over the world. i was like, i don't know. kind of reaching a little bit. >> jimmy: they're not thinking about this in africa, i promise you there's no -- >> i don't think they are. >> jimmy: did you do dumb stuff when you were a kid? >> yeah. i loved -- well -- there was a moment when i was younger, where me and my fifth grade best friend, she brought in -- someone -- she didn't, but a kid in our school brought in ha handcu handcuffs, guess his dad was a cop. i grew up in a very blue collar town where everybody had handcuffs, i guess. and we handcuffed ourselves to each other and, like, threw away the key by accident. and then we spent the whole day handcuffed together. >> jimmy: was it terrible? >> no, it was awesome.
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because i loved attention as a little kid and i was just like, stop looking at me, i can't believe you guys are, like, so concerned with my handcuffs. and then some, like, stupid teacher found the key, like, you know, like, in the middle of the day and ruined everything. >> jimmy: and ruined the whole thing for you. >> yeah. don't find keys, teachers. >> jimmy: "parks and recreation" is a very funny show. >> thank you. >> jimmy: seems like every season more people kind of figure that out. >> thank you. >> jimmy: things are going well on the show, i presume? >> yeah, it's a dream job. we're in season five and we're so excited to be back and i love everybody. >> jimmy: you had john mccain on the show. >> that's right. my old acting buddy. >> jimmy: yeah, right. >> we've hit the boards many times. >> jimmy: do you have any private moments with him? are there any private moments with him? >> well -- private moments in life? >> jimmy: you know what i'm saying. >> well, we got to act together on "snl" and we had to do a lifetime movie parody and we took a shower together.
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that's a private moment. >> jimmy: that's pretty private. >> he's a really fun and always game and him and a bunch of senators did stuff on our show and it was really great to have him. >> jimmy: do you think he's watching the debates tonight with a single tear streaming down his face as he looks at mitt romney? >> no, he's probably watching with a single malt. [ laughter ] is what i think he's watching. and he's probably very excited that he's not there. i can't imagine how stressful that would be. >> jimmy: well, it's great to see you. thank you for coming. always a pleasure. amy poehler, her show is called "parks and recreation." it airs thursday nights at 9:30 on nbc. we'll be right back with alan arkin. [ male announcer ] new 5 rpm gum. choose your energy. ♪
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at&t. rethink possible. [ man ] tell me about that. [ phil ] katie and i talked about really committing to making a difference in the amount of gas that we use. she was using 8 to 10 tankfuls. i was using 5 tankfuls. now i use one tankful a month, and she may use about two. it drives like a sports car. it handles very well. people are a little surprised that a hybrid zipped by them the way that i do. [ male announcer ] see phil's story and more at the camry effect. camry from toyota. presidethis message. barack obama and i approve... and more at the camry effect. anncr: bernie madoff. ken lay. dennis kozlowski. criminals. gluttons of greed. and the evil genius who towered over them? one man has the guts to speak his name.
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we got a special on it... ♪ yeah, baby this is for me... ♪ ♪ i know it's for me... it's 'cause i've been looking at pricing on i know what a fair price is now so my confidence is just been, coming out of me. ♪ ♪
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>> jimmy: welcome back. still to come, music from garbage. our next guest is an academy award-winning actor who has appeared in more than 80 motion pictures, among them "little miss sunshine," "the in-laws," "glengarry glen ross" and the new movie "argo." >> okay, you got six people hiding out in a town of, what, 4 million people all whom chant "death to america" all the live long day. you want to set up a movie in a week. you want to lie to hollywood, a town where everybody lies for a living.
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then, you're going to sneak 007 over here into a country who wants cia blood on their breakfast cereal and you're going to walk the brady bunch out of the most watched city in the world. >> plus 100 militia at the airport. that's right. >> right. look, i ghot ot to tell you, we suicide missions in the army that had better odds than this. >> reporter: "argo" opens in theaters october 12th. please welcome alan arkin. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: this one's closer. >> hi, jimmy. >> jimmy: how are you? thanks for coming. great to have you here. >> i'm alive. i'm well and alive. >> jimmy: it's a pleasure to meet you. i found out you live in new mexico now. which i did not expect. i figured you'd be in new york or something. >> why? >> jimmy: i don't know.
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seems like you're a new yorker. >> i was born in new york. that's the best i could give it. >> jimmy: that's it. where do you live in new mexico? >> far away. >> jimmy: far away. how did you wind up there? >> well, i worked there at a dude ranch when i was in my teens. i spent a couple of summers there. it was the happiest time of my life up until then. i didn't go back for 40 years. a friend of mine moved there, he said, come and visit. we went there for a week and fell madly in love with it again and there we are. >> jimmy: wow. i was reading through your memoir, i don't know if you mind if i mention it, "an improvised life." and i did not know you were one of the founding members of second city. >> yeah. >> jimmy: the famous improv comedy group. [ applause ] that's -- and amy poehler came out of second city. >> yeah. >> jimmy: she owes a debt to you in a way. >> she owes a great debt to me. >> jimmy: she didn't try to repay it, though, i'm guessing. this movie is terrific. you did a great job in it, too.
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>> thank you. >> jimmy: it's such a great story and it's executed so well. and, did you enjoy working with ben affleck? >> until he started doing imitations of me. [ laughter ] he drove my slightly nuts. >> jimmy: how long before he started imitating you? >> it took him about three seconds. >> jimmy: three seconds, yeah? >> but he's -- i said when i saw the first cut, this is going to put him in the ranks of the great american directors. >> jimmy: i agree with you. i agree with you. [ applause ] and when people -- do people often imitate you when they meet you? >> no, he and kevin pollack. but kevin pollack does me so well, that he's left messages, as me, on my answering machine, i thought it was me. when did i say that? >> jimmy: why am i calling myself? do people -- what do people -- you've been in so many movies. i mentioned, you've been in more than 80 movies. what do people mention to you most when they see you or meet you? >> they look at me and they say,
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"i know you from somewhere" and i say, "yeah, i come around here a lot." >> jimmy: i was watching -- i saw "the in-laws" recently and there's a great seen where you are running and -- suerpentine. >> jimmy: with peter faulk. >> he didn't want to do that scene. >> jimmy: why? >> he comes in this morning, he said, this scene is no good. by that time, we were very close. so, i grabbed him by the throat and i said, "shut up! shut up and do the damn scene." he said, "okay," and he backed up. and for 20 years, people, every time it's on, they say, serpentine! serpentine! >> jimmy: which movie did you have the most fun? >> "the godfather." >> jimmy: "the godfather." really? why? [ applause ] >> wait a minute. >> jimmy: you weren't in "the godfather." >> i'm sorry. must have -- "gone with the wind.
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" wait a minute, hold on. which did i -- there's about 10 or 12. i'm embarrassed to say, maybe i don't have a lot -- >> jimmy: let's go through each of your movies. let's start from the beginning, if we could. >> that would take a good three minutes. >> jimmy: no, there are a lot of movies and nothing -- is there an actor or director that you've always wanted to work with that you -- >> they're all dead. >> jimmy: they're all dead now? >> i always wanted to work with sydney lament. he came to me at a banquet once, he was about three foot tall and he looked up at me, he said, mr. arkin, i said, yeah? he said, can i ask you a question? i said, sure. he said, i've offered you parts in three movies and you turned me down three times why? i said, because i would rather work with you than any director working in the united states and i didn't feel like i could score at any of those parts.
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chances are, if i work with you, it will only be once and when i do, i want to score. he said, well, okay, i understand. and then, a month later, he handed me a script for a television series, which i didn't want to do particularly, but i couldn't turn down the idea of working with him. it was a great part and so i got to work with him for two years, which, every moment of which was just great. >> jimmy: what series was that? >> called "100 center street." >> jimmy: okay. and so, did you feel like you scored in that particular role? >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: well, that's -- >> and i had a great time with him. it was -- >> jimmy: there's a great story in the book about groucho marx. coming to see you when you were young -- >> at second city. came to see us at second city. we had a routine where i played khrushchev and somebody else played my translator and somebody else was playing kennedy and we fielded questions from the audience. we knew we were in for trouble because we knew he was in the audience. and i wore kind of a workman's hat and there was -- this was
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the time -- it was the height of the cold car. so, we got asked a lot of serious questions, which we answered humorously. >> jimmy: the audience would chime in and ask questions. >> and, the hand goes up, it's g gr groucho's hand. mr. khrushchev. i said, yes? where did you get that hat? i answered the question. boom, his hand goes up again. he said, what size is that hat? he goes on for 15 minutes about the damn hat. and after 15 -- we were all completely cracking up on the stage. we ran off the stage. >> jimmy: what a thrill that is. you got to spend time with him? >> he ended up being a friend. and i loved him. i was crazy about him. >> jimmy: he's a guy i wish i had a chance to meet. >> he was very humble. he was amazingly very humble. when i would compliment, he would wave me away and say, if it wasn't for my brothers, i would have been nothing. >> jimmy: wow, that's something.
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i disagree with him. >> yeah. but going out to dinner with him was like being in a movie. he would entertain everybody in the restaurant. >> jimmy: he's one of those guys, yeah. well, great to have you here. really is. you did a great job in the movie. i hope everybody goes to see it. it's called "argo." it's in theaters friday, october 12th. alan arkin, everybody. we'll be right back with music from garbage. [ dollar ] that's me. l50858544p. but i'm not just a number. i have a purpose. a higher purpose. [ muffled ] have some respect!
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>> jimmy: this is their new cd, it's called "not your kind of people." here with the song "control," garbage! ♪ ♪ the world might end the night might fall rain on down and cover us all ♪ ♪ and drown us with the burdens of our sins maybe i'll look you in the eye ♪ ♪ tell you you don't wanna die maybe i'll hold my breath
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and jump right in ♪ ♪ maybe i'll hold my breath and jump right in ♪ ♪ i never saw you coming from inside my little prison your autograph would really buy me time ♪ ♪ if you think you are the reason give me something to believe in ♪ ♪ it's always darkest right before the dawn it's always darkest right before the dawn ♪ ♪ i confess i've lost control i let my guard down i let my truth out ♪ ♪ oh i confess i've lost control i let my guard down i let my truth out ♪
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♪ ♪ the final celebration a bad hallucination flip a coin and see which way i fall ♪ ♪ the shark tail is singing we love to watch him killing and suffer through a never ending day ♪ ♪ suffer through a never ending day ♪ ♪ i can feel i've lost control i let my guard down i let the truth out ♪ ♪ oh i can feel i've lost control i let my guard down ♪ ♪ and i let my truth out
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♪ ♪ i was trapped like an animal in my skin i was punished like an animal for my sins ♪ ♪ i was blind i was caged and i was tricked and i was suffocating i was suffocating ♪ ♪ i can feel i've lost control control control ♪ ♪ i can feel i've lost control control ♪ i can feel i've lost control ♪ ♪ oh i can feel feel my hunger feel my hunger ♪
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♪ i can feel i've lost control ♪ ♪ feel my hunger feel my hunger ♪ ♪ i was suffocating ♪ i was suffocating
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>> jimmy: i want to thank amy poehl poehler, i want to thank alan arkin. apologies to matt damon, we ran out of time. tomorrow night, zac efron, jack black & kyle gass and music from tenacious d. this is their new cd, it's called "not your kind of people." playing us off the air with "blood for poppies", see the full performance at once again, garbage! good night! ♪ ♪ salute the sun i've been sitting here all night long hauling rock over buddha with the longhorn ♪ ♪ i got a hole so rip a pocket off my uniform with the blackwatch boys gets your heads down ♪


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